This first piece, entitled, "The Last Time", is actually a poem I wrote when my step-grandmother (my step-dads mom) passed away. She lived in Michigan up until the last few years of her life when she moved down to Arizona to be warmer and closer to other family members. The last time I saw her, she was up here in Michigan visiting during the summer of 2010. Before she went back to Arizona at the end of that August, she gave me a hug and said, "Hopefully I'll get to see you again." I thought it was pretty strange that she would say such a thing. Almost like she knew it would probably be the last time. And it was. She passed away in January of that winter.
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The Last Time
The last time I saw her
She gave me a kiss
Looked me in the eyes
Said I would be missed
She turned and walked away
Unsure at her ripe old age
About the next chapter
Or even just another page
Grandma boarded the plane
Flew back home to Arizona
A few short months later
She passed in Santa Rosa
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This next piece is one that I wrote just after the passing of my step-dad. I wrote it through my mothers perspective. To me, it seemed like nights were the worst for her. For the first few weeks after Wades death, my mom couldn't bring herself to sleep in their bed. It was a sad time for her and it wasn't easy to watch her struggle. I came up with this poem one night while sitting there wondering how it must have felt for her. She has never read this as I just couldn't bring myself to show her. It's called, "When it Hurts the Most".
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When it Hurts the
Most
At night is when it
hurts the most
I can feel you here
but I know I’m alone
Your spirit lingers
on empty bed
I cling to memories
saved in my head
A sudden chill sweeps
over my body
An overwhelming
sensation that burns
A cool breeze hits my
tempered face
With the warmth of
your loving embrace
Whispers float with
the quiet tides
A rolling frequency
of crashing waves
My ears pick up your
static sound
On a whim of hope I
call out loud
Your lips brush
gently against mine
They are what I long
for the most
Your fingertips run
softly through my hair
As I lay restless in
the darkened air
I watch for you with
desperation
But my eyes are blind
to your presence
They search with no
avail
They’ve fallen off
the trail
Only my dreams will
keep you alive
It’s not enough for
peace of mind
I can feel you here
but I know I’m alone
That’s why at night
is when it hurts the most
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